Allow Room For Failure

 Allow room for failure

I’m getting real and personal here for a moment, which I think is important as a teacher of artists and an artist myself. I recently had a therapy session where I described the week I had just completed to my therapist. 


This was the list and the role I was in for each thing:


  • I shot an episode of a show that’s on Netflix - Acting

  • I ran two rehearsals of The Play That Goes Wrong - Associate Directing

  • I private coached 15 students - Coaching

  • I presented a brand new class that I created to a large group of actors. Some of whom I’ve never met - Teaching

  • I taught two additional classes that I created the concept for - Teaching

  • I started potty training our daughter (along with my husband) who is a year and ten months old - Parenting

And……

  • I had friends over to our house for an overdue catch up and fun night together - DRINKING!!!!!! ;-)


I explained to my therapist that I felt a little overwhelmed and he said he understood because that’s a substantial list. He asked me what is the MOST overwhelming about it? And I explained that I found myself getting stressed and sleepy (which is how depression appears for me) at the THOUGHT of doing the things. The actual doing of them, for the most part, is enjoyable .


We learned through our conversation that what makes it stressful for me is my fear of failure. 

Failure if I’m not good on the TV show.

Failure if my classes aren’t 100% valuable.

Fear that our daughter won’t figure out how to pee and poop in her cute little lemon colored plastic toilet. 

Fear, fear, fear blah blah blah. 


My fear of failure made my busy, tiring week so much more exhausting. 

Then my therapist said “What would happen if you allowed room for failure?” 

All of a sudden it was as if he gave me a boost of energy and an extra two hours in every day.  Allowing room for failure just meant that I put less pressure on myself to be perfect at everything.


I share this with you for two reasons:

1) I am regularly encouraging my students to step beyond their comfort zone (which often involves some fear) and I don’t want to be a hypocrite.

2) I think it’s really important that students don’t look at their teachers and elders (to some of you) as people who have it all  figured out all of the time. 


I love working with artists because I have a DEEP respect and admiration for the amount of COURAGE it takes us to do what we do. Allowing room for failure doesn’t mean you’re going to BE a failure it just means that you can lessen the GRIP on needing to be a success and as a result will likely enjoy the process more and maybe even become more successful. 


Keep up the great work


Mark 

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